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Random Blindness and Epiphany

“You can feel two completely different, and conflicting ways, about the same thing, dear.”

I just had this conversation with YoungerDaughter, and when I heard those words come out of my mouth – I stopped, took a breath, and started writing.

Epiphany.

Defined at Dictionary.com as:  “a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.”

Yeah, one of them.

I started this blog as a place to put down my thoughts, stories, things I think up in the dark recesses of the night, and my mind.  And it’s been a lot of fun.

 Some times the words have come easy, seeming to just fall out of my fingers, and I can write the post quickly, punching my way through the wall of words jumbled together in my head, to create something that I was truly proud of.  These were good days, days when I rode the high of creation for hours.  Pouring the muse out over more than just the blog, I’d work on my crafts at home, or write on my novel, or compose poetry for one of the other blogs, or something similar.

It’s also been a lot of work.  Hard work.  There have been days where I struggled to find anything to say, much less anything “witty” or “entertaining”.  There have been days where I simply didn’t have anything at all to say, so I just didn’t.  I hated these days, the ones where I feel like I’m mired in a thick, sticky muck, struggling to pull my boots free, only to end up falling face first into the gunk.

Blogging, although it can be a lot of fun, as well as cathartic… can be a lot of slogging, fighting, kicking and swearing.  It doesn’t always just “happen”, there’s no magic formula, and no one’s got the answer you’re seeking to make this  a “snap” to do.

You have to figure out your tone, your voice, and your method – for yourself.  Rather like growing up, there will be many days where you just don’t want to get out of your own “bed-head” and do the work.  You’re tired – just 5 more minutes, Mom, Please?  You’ll do your homework after – whatever you have planned for the rest of the day.  There are a lot of random excuses for procrastination.  I know, I’ve used most of them, up to, and including, I’m just too tired today.

Well, enough.

I’m going to challenge myself.

I’m going to get out of my way, and simply do the homework.

I’ve done it before, over on my Spirit blog, where last year I dedicated one whole month to posting something every day, except weekends.  Even if it was something small, I posted anyway.  I used to post here every weekday, but fell out.  I could use all the excuses I told myself, I was stressed, tired, going through an emotional roller-coaster, blah, blah, blah…

Whatever.

Whether I feel like it or not, whether I think I have anything to say or not, I’m going to post here.  Every. Day.  Including weekends.  Even if I have to simply put up a small one from my phone.  I don’t care.  I need to get out of the rut I’m in, and back into the groove of writing creatively.  I need to turn the lights back on in my imagination, before I get too used to the dark.

I’m going to do this until August 31. 

Watch me.  See if I don’t.

 

 

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4 thoughts on “Random Blindness and Epiphany

  1. If you don’t…..I’ll be reaching through this screen and will be slapping you upside yo head! 🙂 Please…no need to thank me….. It’s what I do…… 🙂

  2. Needed to read this – thanks. I’be been stuck for a month now and almost deleted my entire web site. Will keep trying. Thinking of starting more than one blog rather than examining different subjects on one site. But I thought, what about the times I can’t think of anything to say even on one? Confused sometimes over quality content (writing for others) and from-the-heart content…

    • I have multiple blogs, and post only rarely on the others, just when the mood- and the muse- strike. This one? There are times when I don’t really have much to say… so I try to keep a list of subjects/drafts/ideas in my phone/notebook for those times.

      And sometimes, I just don’t post. I’ve hung out the “Gone Fishin” sign more than once. Everybody hits the wall, eventually. And you’re the only one who needs to decide what to post. There’s a little of everything, here. Whatever floats through my head, really. So if you need a “blog-cation” – take it! Catch your breath, relax, and when you’re ready? You’ll decide what comes next!

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