I usually have a million questions floating around in my brain, like rabid sea-monkeys on Red Bull. I try to tackle them one at a time, but right now they’re all pushing and shoving, and I’ve sent them to their respective rooms for a time out.
We’ll see who gets respected around here!
Anyway, I figured I’d post some of the questions I’ve got, just to see if anyone else has the answers I’m looking for… anyone? anyone?……Bueller?…..Bueller?……
1. How is it that every 6 months, I throw random, unused and unusable garbage out of my basement… and yet, a month later – it’s all back? Random boxes, old Christmas gift bags, and outworn shoes and boots seem to be the big favorites. Where does this crap come from? I KNOW I got rid of it all just a few months ago!
Is this house of mine like the Bermuda Triangle in reverse? Instead of stuff disappearing, it mysteriously finds its way into my house from other places? *cue creepy music*
Are the children bringing this stuff home like stray kittens? And how to I get it to stop? Is there a spray, or traps, or maybe an exorcism ceremony for this type of thing?
So why is it, that as soon as someone goes into the bathroom to take a shower, or a bath, the cats want to perch precariously on the edge of the tub and contemplate their navels over the running water?
And then they blame us when they fall in and get soaked – tearing shins and arms to bloody shreds as we attempt to aid them in their escape from the watery hell they’ve fallen into?
And why do my children not remember this fact from one hygiene session to the next, and “accidentally” forget to close the bathroom door before Fisher and Sally make it into the room?
3. I worked on my basement this weekend. Swept the whole basement floor before mopping, and dusted and moved furniture, working on sorting out the ex’s stuff so I can figure out what’s garbage and what needs to be picked up by him, or else.
I was so exhausted after all the sweeping, mopping, scrubbing, and shoving large pieces of furniture by myself… and yet?
Why do I feel compelled, almost obsessed, with going immediately back down there?
Oh, wait, I guess I actually have an answer for this one. I want my life back.
That means, getting rid of the ex’s stuff, and sorting through everything else, to find out what actually needs to be held onto, and what I can throw, gleefully and with many giggles, into the trash. There are many times where I thought my ex and children were in the “pre-hoarder” stage… refusing to get rid of anything, “Just in case some day I need it”.
I would like to have a bonfire built of all these unfulfilled “what-ifs” in my backyard…. but the city would think my house was on fire.
Or maybe the neighborhood…
Yeah, there’s a lot of crap still in my basement. But I’m working on it.
Just like I’m working on the rest of the questions burning holes in my head. Someday…