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Life in the Minefield

Holiday get-togethers with my family are a never-ending source of surprise.

Just a nice, leisurely stroll down memory lane…

and BOOM.

One more casualty, blindsided, more often than not, by some half-forgotten slight from years gone by, or a previously unremarked grievance brought twisting and kicking out into the blinking holiday lights.

Served up with the bird and a healthy helping of guilt sauce.

2 years ago, I had an altercation, via Facebook mail, with my sibling.  He saw insult where there was none, and lambasted me with venom and bile.  Right about this time of year. 

It was actually the catalyst that spurred me into blogging, originally.  I had posted something, a philosophical question, on Facebook, and he took offense – “calling me out”, as it were, even though I’d meant nothing towards him, and was simply exploring a personal question I had.  Anyway, I took it to the internet, and found myself creating a space where I could post whatever I wanted, without worrying about getting hoisted on the pike of sibling rivalry.

Last year, there was another altercation… at this time of year… oddly enough.

Over pie.

Yes, you read that right.  PIE.

Pumpkin Pie, to be exact.

It was stupid, really, but it caused a lot of hurt feelings on both sides, and laid a new web of mines in the family field.

You see, for many years, I was always the one who made the pumpkin pie.  It was my favorite, and my mom had 2 or 3 other varieties to make, so I was the one who made it.  It was just assumed, by my mom, myself, by just about everyone, that I would bring the pumpkin pie to dinner.  I got pretty good at them, at any rate.

Well, last year, after the dinner was over, and everyone had gone home, I got an angry phone call from my brother, burning my crust because, I guess, my sister-in-law’s feelings had been hurt when she didn’t get to make the pumpkin pie. 


I didn’t understand.  She hadn’t said one word about pie.  And Mom hadn’t even hinted that my sis-in-law had wanted to make them.  If she’d spoken up, I’d have gladly brought something else to dinner!  But, of course, according to my brother, it was all because I was such a brat, and had to have my own way all the time.


So, this year, I told my mom that, under no uncertain terms, I was not making pumpkin pie to bring to Thanksgiving dinner.  I was not going to get my chestnuts roasted again, not over a stupid pastry.

Mom asked my sister-in-law what she wanted to bring.  Anything she wanted, she told her.  Because I said I was staying well out of it, and would bring whatever I was asked to bring.

She didn’t pick pumpkin pie.


Uh, really?

So, one guess what I’m taking to Thanksgiving dinner this year?

That’s right.  Cool-Whip coated landmines. 

Bring on the good times.




10 thoughts on “Life in the Minefield

    • You could be onto something there… after all, I’m not sure that vegetables are meant to be made into dessert, are they? There could be some underlying resentment there on the pumpkin’s part!

  1. I love making pumpkin pie, too.

    Ah, holidays. Something you actually look forward to that, once they arrive, you actually wish you were back at work. 🙂

  2. Wow … what is it about Thanksgiving and family squabbles? I got really annoyed with my brother one year when he just sat and bitched about everything all night. Including his lack of female companionship. I finally (and in my defense I’d had a couple glasses of wine) said “We shit, if this is how you go on with everybody it’s no wonder no woman wants to be around you”. Yes, I actually said that. 🙄

    It’s just hubby and I this year. I’ll miss the kids but I understand that the inlaws need holiday time with them too. And with Mercury going retrograde tonight, and a lovely eclipse new moon tomorrow night, I’m fine with it just being us to minimize the miscommunications.

    Didn’t mean to write a book here … have a wonder Thanksgiving dear!

    • D’oh … that should have been “Well shit” not “We shit” I need to do better at proofreading! Though I think “We shit” is funnier, yes? 😀

    • Mercury goes retrograde AND a new moon eclipse? Gah! No wonder…
      LOL, actually, normally when Mercury goes retro, it ends up being pretty good for me, since I seem to think sideways anyway, it all kind of straightens out, somehow. It’s weird, but true.

      I like the reply you had for your brother… wish I could do the same with mine, but the level of repression in my family is over my hip-waders.

      At least I’ll have the whole weekend to recover! 🙂

      • Yeah … it’s been nuts here with drivers in general the last two weeks and I was scratching my head since Mercury hadn’t gone retrograde yet. I thought Uranus squared with the moon and both in opposition to Pluto last Monday might have been the cause, but toss in that new moon eclipse and it’s all making sense now. I’m hiding out until Sunday!

        Don’t know if I’d have said that to brother if I’d not had wine … I usually bite my tongue to keep peace. But it needed to be said and after I told him about it, my dad told me he was glad somebody said it … after he got done laughing. 😆

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