My surgery on May 26th was more than I thought, and harder to recover from than I anticipated. A hysterectomy, removal of multiple inclusions of endometrosis, & work on my bladder, all meant that I didn’t recover as fast as I wanted, or as quickly & thoroughly as some others expected. It’s been a long, tired road, but I’m nearing the end if it.
My 6-week recheck appointment is fast approaching (Tuesday), and I’m fairly sure he’ll tell me I can go back to my normal life. I haven’t had anymore unexpected pain, or bleeding, even if I do still get tired quicker, it’s not anywhere near as bad as it was. And, I’ve learned to take it easy when I get home, no heavy lifting on my own, and to rest , at least for short periods, in between more demanding tasks.
Yes, I’m doing my own yard work again.
Yes, I’m digging holes, trimming hedges, mowing, pruning, weeding flowerbeds, moving furniture, all of it.
No, I’m not going to fall down, because, as I said, I’m being cautious. If it feels like too much, I stop, or ask for help, or wait till I’m rested to try again. I need my independence back.
I hate relying on others for things I know I’m perfectly capable of doing on my own. I hate asking for help. I hate being a burden at all, whether the help is willingly given, or done out of familial obligation.
I’d rather just do it myself, & not worry that I’m imposing on someone else’s time.
OnlySon is home this weekend for the holiday. We have a standing date for the 4th, having done this for years, as his father always had to work, & worked nights. Now, it’s special to me, because it’s our tradition, something he & I do together, when there’s so very little that we do in this way. When the time rolls around, we get fries & drinks from McD’s, & head out north of town, to watch the fireworks stores put on their nightly show, & to watch all the surrounding neighbor farms put on their shows.
One of the good things about North Dakota? When you leave town, you can see the horizon in 360 degrees, leaving a stunning vista for fireworks, stars, meteor showers, and Aurora Borealis, when the seasons change.
It’s a small thing, this tradition of ours, fries & fireworks, but it’s something he & I came up with together, and I cherish it, because it’s not just the holiday that’s special…it’s who you spend it with.
And all too soon, next year, in fact, he’ll be all grown up, & probably too old to hang with his ol’ ma for French fries and fireworks.