I’ve had this feeling for a while now.
Call it nerves, call it anxiety, call it fear, it all comes down to the same thing.
My heart is screaming at me to “GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!”
While my head is telling me “Stupid, you have shit to do, people to care for, a house, animals, friends, blah, blah, blah… You can’t just up and leave. Figure it out, psycho.”
And all the while, this phrase keeps playing over and over in my head. (Panic at the Disco’s song Nicotine is where this came from)
“It’s better to burn
Than to fade away
It’s better to leave
Than to be replaced”
Obviously, the anti-anxiety meds aren’t completely doing their job, or this wouldn’t be freaking me out this bad…but I’m still here, so they’re helping somewhat.
Fuck.
I need to figure this out.