For the last couple of nights I’ve been spending the major portion of my time just sitting.
Thinking about everything & nothing, it’s been chaotic & silent inside my brain, both at the same time.
Rather like having the TV set on a static-only channel, white noise the constant companion, I haven’t been able to focus long enough to actually accomplish anything of note. I have crafts that sit on my shelf, mocking me, telling me silently that, if I don’t get busy soon, I’ll be letting myself, as well as others, down. My house quietly collects all the dog and cat hair in corners, dust bunnies turning into rabid, mini badgers just waiting to grow up into Tazzy-devils. I have 4 days of my dishes in the sink, waiting for me, only to be passed over as I can’t seem to motivate myself to take care of them.
I know I need to just push myself. I know this.
Yesterday was chaotic & emotionally difficult.
Hell, that’s an understatement.
Yesterday evening was an emotional train wreck.
And all it took was a phone call to derail my brain & heart.
Some of the biggest decisions I’d made lately, fell apart in one conversation. And I’m still trying to process it all.
Only, it seems my thoughts have gotten stuck in zombieland, and one of the undead is gnawing on my brain, while another has gone after my heart…