Home » daydreaming » If I Never See You Again…

If I Never See You Again…

If I never see you again, 

I want you to know, that I will go on.  There will be moments…moments of doubt, of nostalgia, of longing. But, I will move forward, as I always do. Without you. 

By your choice.

If I never see you again, I want you to know, that I want only the best for you because that’s who I am.  Unable to hold a grudge for long, I let go of the hurt and disappointment. But with that, I also let go of the feelings I had for you.

All of them.

Untethered, I simply wish to forge ahead, seeking a love that is wholly mine. One who will want the best for me, and who will walk beside me, rather than in front, or behind.  Someone who won’t wish me to sit on a pedestal, but will accept me, with all my flaws and gifts.  Someone who will see that I’m not perfect, and love me because of that.

Someone who will not compare me to others, or put me down with my whole gender, simply because he doesn’t wish to take the time to understand.

Someone who will talk to me, with me, and won’t shut me out. Someone who wishes to share his life with me, as he shares in mine.

If I never see you again, I want you to know, that because of you, I have a better understanding of what I want out of life, and out of love.

I will not settle, ever again, for less than what I want.  I will not simply accept the minimum of what’s offered…because I deserve more. 

I deserve better than being treated as though I were less than. 

If I never see you again…

It will no longer hurt.

Because you weren’t real. You were only memories.

And I am of the present…looking toward the future.

No more apologies, no more regrets. Those are of the past. 

And so are you.

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