Much like chaos theory, love has many twists & turns, & is usually surprising…with a side of “Holy Crap!” People will continually act in unexpected ways, things will get broken, things will get better, and sometimes – they fall apart completely.
But, at least with me, the theory of love is stringless.
No obligations implied or attached.
Love, to me, is pure & freely given. It expects nothing. It comes in many shapes & sizes; & once given, can only be rescinded through seriously hurtful actions on the part of the receiver.
When I love, whether it be for a child, a pet, a friend, family member, or lover, I give my love without reservation. I seem to be unable to “hold back”, as some would put it.
I don’t see this as a failing, just a difference of modus operandi.
Yes, sometimes it means I get hurt. Yes, sometimes severely so.
But, it also is the only way I know how to love.
I expect nothing from the recipient. You don’t have to love me back. You don’t even have to respond when I say the words.
That’s not why I say them.
I say the words, because, again, that’s who I am. I want you to know that you mean something to me, that I value you in my life, & that I am willing to be that open, honest & vulnerable with you. It shows a fair amount of trust, because it opens me up to ridicule (not that that’s ever been a response, but still).
If I say “I love you”, it means that I see you, I have a place for you in my heart, & you are free to come & go.
It is not the same as saying “I’m in love with you.” There’s a fine line between the 2 phrases, but it is distinct & measurable.
And no, I don’t say the words lightly. I know exactly the weight they carry, & that they need to mean something.
So, if I’ve said these words to you, you can bet that I mean every syllable.
And you are free to respond, or not, as you wish.
Because real LOVE means wanting the other person’s happiness…even if it means you’re not a part of it.