Home » depression » It’s the Thought

It’s the Thought

If it’s the thought that counts, then I guess today counts as a minor success as far as birthdays go.

A lot of people thought about me today.

Some of my coworkers got me a cake, since they know there’s “no one at home” for me to celebrate with. (Their words, true, but they hurt when I heard them out loud anyway)

I didn’t want to be here at work today for this birthday.

Why? Because it’s always the same thing. The well-meaning well-wishes, & the “interested questions”. I just got asked “Big birthday plans?”

Nope.

“Why not?”

No one to celebrate with.

My parents are out of state, visiting my brother & his family. They’re never here for my birthday, anyway.

My kids are not here. Busy, out of state, different town, or simply don’t remember, whatever. But I get messages from the girls.

My Beloved Nephew & best friend lives in Georgia, so I don’t get to see him.

I did, however, get to go out with a friend on Saturday to watch a movie, the original 1960 version of Little Shop of Horrors.

It was hilarious, & I’m so glad I went.

The friend I went with is a good one, someone I love hanging out with, someone I trust & know I can count on. She’s been a good friend for many reasons, and many years.

But – I just want this day over.

It hurts, remembering that, when the workday is over, I’ll be coming home alone…and it’ll just be the cats and me…

It’s the thought…

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