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A Dozen of this and that

Today, it’s been 12 years since I started blogging on WordPress.

Oh, sure, I had my blog on another platform for a while prior to switching over here, but, I can neither remember the platform name, nor the length of time I was there, because I’ve been here so long.

And… My whole life has been completely upended multiple times in those 12 years.

It tends to happen.

See, when I started all this, it was a way for me to “scream into the darkness”, as I used to say, but… I had a hard time actually doing that, for a long time.

I started off with my original reason for blogging, which was that I’d needed a safe place to put all of my feelings, questions about life, the universe, & everything.

I had a blood relation take offense to something I’d written, on my own space, for my own reasons. It wasn’t aimed at that person, had nothing to do with that person, but they still had decided that I was a horrible person, & raked me over the coals for, what to me, was a simple, philosophical question I had, & was looking for answers to.

So, I started an anonymous blog to do my soul-searching.

And, after my initial posts, I fell into writing about normal, everyday, mundane things. Humorous, usually. But not the real, raw, self-intospection I needed.

Until, my past & present started to bleed into one another.

My introspection started uncovering things I’d “conveniently” forgotten. More like buried deep within my own psyche.

It led me to reasons why I’d lived as I had, self-destructive behaviors and all.

I started to get a handle on my own flaws, foibles, failings and faults.

I also started to see the good things.

It took me a while to allow nyself to truly be vulnerable here, but I was encouraged by friends I’d met while blogging, & led with my chin.

And, the tone of the blog changed, to become a journey of self-discovery, mentally, emotionally, and more.

I’ve posted some flash fiction here, too, because that is also a part of who I am.

Or was. I haven’t posted any fiction in a loooong time now. Life has led me down a long, dusty path, & there hasn’t been any fiction for a while that was yelling to get out.

I’ve been too busy, just hanging on.

I want to start blogging again, though. I do miss it, sometimes. There are a lot of things I still want to explore, explain, & examine.

But, I can feel the tone changing again.

Don’t ask me how it will end up, because in all honesty, I’m not sure where it’s going yet.

Maybe I should just hop the train, and settle in for the ride.

Another dozen years couldn’t hurt… Right?

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