The Little Things

Yeah, yeah, I know what today is.

Who doesn’t?

I’ve never really been all that big on the 14th of February.

Mostly, because I have an issue with people who only show how much they care on 1 day of the year.  If you care about someone, it shouldn’t just be on 1 day, it should be all the time.

And it’s those little things, those almost-not-obvious moments, that mean the most.

*It’s stopping by because you know they aren’t feeling good, and need to have someone close, even if it’s across the room because they’re virulently contagious.

*It’s bringing cough drops, because you want them to feel better, and you know they don’t have any.

*It’s remembering that they like something, and remembering that they don’t like some things.

*It’s making someone laugh… even if they’re really grouchy and don’t want to.

*It’s sidelong glances when you think they’re not watching, just to find out that they are… and then they blush.

*It’s paying attention to the things they say, even if you don’t agree with it, or understand it – letting them talk something out and just actively listening.

*It’s knowing that you can argue with them – and they won’t just walk away, they’ll argue back. 

*Taking someone’s hand, just to hold it.

*Being content just to sit and watch bad cable tv with them, because they’re getting a kick out of it, and you like watching them laugh.

*Offering to help them when they need somebody who knows how to fix stuff.  Because you know how to fix stuff.

Most of these things don’t cost much, if anything. 

But they are priceless.

And I’d rather have them than a million cards.  Cards are words printed on paper, and sure, they can get your feelings down in indelible ink, proof admissible in court and all that… and yeah, they’re nice too.

But if I had to choose just one, I’d rather have all the little moments, the small touches and smiles, the day-to-day proof.

Oh, and flowers.  Cause I’m a girl, and I’m supposed to want flowers, right?

These are actually my favorites – carnations – cause they smell wonderful!

Ok, so yeah, I like flowers too.

 

 

So, if there’s someone in your life that you care about… you don’t need to say it with flowers, or chocolates, or cards today.

 

Laugh at their jokes, listen to them talk about their day/kids/work/favorite morning cartoon/frustrations/joys, take their hand, look into their eyes…

 

Show them.

 

And not just today.

 

*Love ~ it’s what’s for dinner

*Love ~ better than a kick to the head…wait – what?

*Love ~ just another wordpress.com blog

*Love ~ the other right meet

 

A Song, A Moment, A Card, and A Smile

Or otherwise known as Valentine’s Day – Perfect Day, Apocalypse, or both?

I had a pretty good start on yesterday.  I got surprise flowers from my OtherHalf, had a pretty good day at work, got flowers for my girls, and a gift of kisses (Hershey’s, since I’m no longer allowed to kiss him in public) for OnlySon. 

For some reason?  I didn’t eat supper.  Maybe that’s where I went wrong.  I’m hypoglycemic, so when my blood sugar drops, I get all shaky, weepy, and off-balance.  I’m not sure, but that could have been part of the problem of what came next.  Obviously, my brain was not working at full capacity.

YoungerDaughter worked after school today.  She works as a dietary aid at the local hospital, and I pick her up on school nights, as she doesn’t have a car.  So, when the time rolled around to go after her, I drove up and parked in the parking lot at the hospital and waited. 

My mp3 was playing, and I was fussing with my phone, when Linkin Park’s “Leave Out All the Rest” came on.  I’ve been obsessed with this band lately, and have almost all their songs on my mp3.  But I should have known better with this one song. 

This song is the strongest trigger for me as far as my friend Midnite is concerned.  It reminds me so strongly of things that she said to me over the years that I knew her, that it almost seems as though she’s saying them to my face whenever I hear it.  I thought I could make it through the song, now that it’s been almost 2 years since she passed away.

Well, I made it through the song, but not much further.  After it was over, I realized that I was sitting in the parking lot of the hospital where she passed away, and that was the pull on the trigger.  I had a moment.

A “Moment” is a code word that Midnite’s son, my nephew, and I use to signal that we’d been thinking about her, and were “temporarily emotionally indisposed” .

While this was going on, I was also talking with another friend, Sparrow, who had noticed a post I’d put up on FB about my moment, and how stupid I was to pull this emotional trigger on myself.  She’d immediately checked on me, making sure that I was alright.  She was one of the people that helped me make it through the aftermath of Midnite’s passing, and she’s always been just that thoughtful and amazing. 

Moving on.

YoungerDaughter finally finished work, and we drove home, where I found something lurking in my mailbox:

A lovely card from a lovely friend.

Just the sight of that bright pink envelope made me smile, before I even opened it, because I knew that whatever was contained within, it came from one of the kindest hearts I’ve had the pleasure to get to know in this last year.  And they would be good words.  Happy, heartfelt, make-you-smile words.

And I was right. 

Thanks, Lil k!  Just what I needed, just when I needed it most.

Seems like this is becoming quite the trend with my blogging family – Thanks, my friends, for turning the night back around to love.  Blog-family style.